So walking along today I noticed how weirdly insecure everyone is. Not just people I know, everyone. Strangers.
There I am walking along, chatting away to him, then we pass someone and go quiet. They pass and the burble of chat rises again. Automatically. And I only just realised. Strangers always pause their conversations when walking past someone. Well, not always but usually if there's only a few of them. I didn't even have to ask myself why.
For some reason I feel like someone would be listening in. I don't know why and that seems really arrogant to think someone would bother listening in on my conversation but I'm still subconsciously aware that they could. And I hate it.
I don't know why it should affect me. It just does. I get really insecure walking past strangers. Don't look at me. Don't listen to me. Don't judge me.
Oh, yeah, I'm not going to go to Reading after all. I'm going to get this instead.
It's called a Diana F+. It's from the 1960's, comes out on 120 film and is technically flawed so only costs around £65 on Amazon.Due to the flaws, it's all in soft focus and you get sunspots when the weather's good enough. I've seen some of the photos you can get from this camera and they're so lovely. Almost worth missing Modest Mouse for.
I had a Lucozade today. I feel guilty.
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